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Anne Townsend

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Anne Townsend Latest

This blog post will not be trashed

As a survivor of child sexual abuse, I have heard it all.

Let bygones be bygones.

It’s the past. Move on.

Are you sure you want to go there, after all this time?

I am sure Mummy didn’t know.

Sexual abuse so wasn’t the pattern in our family.

OK, those were the comments I can remember. The really bad ones I forget.

What are the right comments? Because have you noticed that when someone nowadays has cancer, or is mourning the loss of a husband, or a child, or they have lost a limb, they tend to write articles and books telling us how angry they are at the ways the world failed to meet them. They have been mistreated. People said the wrong thing, or they said it too quickly, or too softly, or they shouted. Or they never said enough. Or they said too much. It just never ends. The way people get it wrong. When your world has caved in, the world needs to get it right else they’re going to be in your article or in your book. And not in the chapter about the good people.

Those who tell us to listen more are often the ones whose listening skills are poor. The very people who boast about being open-minded, are the ones that crack down on any Facebook comments that don’t agree with their status update. The world is going to hell in a hand basket, and the American elections are not yet over. Why are you typing this blog post, Anne, at 23:54pm on a Monday night? Because that’s what blog posts are for. Blogs are anchors for groundlessness. Blogs are there for when you have questions.

It’s not the Bob Hewitts and Bill Cosbys that befuddle me as much as the villages that protect the Bobs and the Bills. If it takes a village to raise a child, it takes a village to abuse a child. Can’t everybody just tell the truth? What does Bob Hewitt’s wife think she is doing when she defends her husband in court? Did Bill Cosby’s wife know at the time that he was molesting all those women? Well, she knows now. Let’s forget for a minute about what Bob Hewitt thought he was doing. Why have some of Bob Hewitt’s victims who have stood up to the abuse in public, lost the support of their families, their children, and their friends? What is that all about? Can someone explain to me about the enabling of child sexual abuse? That’s the bit I’m not getting here. It is now 00:07 on a Tuesday morning and Cape Talk is discussing student protests and human faeces. This blog post will not be trashed. It’s a keeper.

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Photo Credit: AnneTownsend